


Shredding Slopes and Hearts

by whovianhalfblood



Category: Megamind (2010)
Genre: Canon Compliant, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, No Beta, Snowboarding, There will be angst later, for now enjoy lots of fluff, more tags to come, rating may change as high as T, totally self-indulgent
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-11
Updated: 2021-03-14
Packaged: 2021-03-18 18:21:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,393
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29986950
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/whovianhalfblood/pseuds/whovianhalfblood
Summary: Wayne takes Roxanne to learn to snowboard for a "date".  When Wayne turns out to be a terrible teacher, he pays for her to get a private lesson. Her instructor has the most beautiful blue skin and green eyes.
Relationships: Megamind/Roxanne Ritchi, Metro Man & Roxanne Ritchi
Comments: 10
Kudos: 18





	1. The First Lesson

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Roxanne tries snowboarding for the first time

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is set at the beginning of college for Wayne and Roxanne, and the very early days of Megamind’s career as a supervillain. They’ve had two public fights at most by now. Roxanne isn’t from Metro City, and the fights didn’t make national news, so she doesn’t realize Wayne is Metro Man and doesn’t recognize Megamind at all. Thanks Jay from discord for giving me some reassurance

It was fall and Roxanne and Metroman were at dinner in public. She understood that this fake-dating thing she’d agreed to required some public ‘performance’, but she’s tired of the same few public dates on repeat. “Wayne, can’t we do something other than dinner and parties and movies, maybe something less public?” she sighs.

“Sure, Roxie. It _is_ getting pretty repetitive, but I don’t really know what else you’re supposed to do for dates. What do you have in mind?” 

Roxanne had recently agreed to “date” Wayne when he’d complained to her while studying together about how his mom was pressuring him to date, and how annoying it was to have to hide from swarms of people on campus who were trying to date him. It also allowed her an excuse to keep her own mom off her back.

“I don’t know. Something more creative. Something new. Maybe I could try one of your hobbies, or you could try one of mine,” she shrugs. 

“Oh! Have you ever gone snowboarding?”

She shook her head.

“I think you would love it, Rox. It’s so much fun to get away from everything and just explore the world and not have to worry about any sort of responsibilities for a few hours. We should go once we start getting snow.”

“That sounds nice, actually. I’ve wanted to try before, but with how expensive it is... it just never was a reality.” They brainstormed some more ideas and after that, Roxanne was feeling a little less bored by the idea of continuing to “date” Wayne Scott.

* * *

A few months later, they headed up to a nearby resort so Roxanne could try snowboarding. They got her set up with a rental set, and then she followed Wayne to the bunny hill. When what felt like an hour (but was probably only 10 minutes) had gone by, and Roxanne still couldn’t even get up, she was ready to throw in the towel. Wayne wasn’t all that helpful, either. 

“Come on, Roxanne, it’s really not that hard. You just have to stand up.”

“Easy for you to say, Thunder Thighs.”

Wayne sighed. “Look, I’m probably just not going to be a good teacher for you. I know this is supposed to be a date, but what if we got you a private lesson, and I can go practice tricks in the terrain park?”

“Yeah, that would be fine with me.”

He handed her his card. “I’ll be back around 4, okay?”

“Sure, okay.” They split up and Roxanne found the sign that said “Ski School.” She signed up and paid for a 2-hour lesson, which would be until 3:30, then was directed to wait outside a door on the side of the building. Soon afterward, an instructor came out the door and 

Wow, he was beautiful.

His eyes were the most brilliant, bright green eyes she’d ever seen. The bit of his face that she could see was a deep, icy blue with a lavender blush on his cheeks. He wore a black helmet with a blue lightning stripe down the middle and short, metal spikes around the top. His suit and board matched the helmet with zig-zags of blue lightning on top of black. 

He walked toward her, snowboard underarm. “Miss Roxanne Ritchi?’

She nodded. “Are you my instructor?”

“I am. You can call me Blue.”

As they walked back over to the bunny hill, he asked how much experience she had.

“Not much, today’s my first time. My friend tried to teach me but probably the only things I’ve done successfully are strap myself to a big stick and give myself a few bruises,” she laughed.

“Well, that’s pretty normal. In that case, we’ll practice skating and gliding first. You should be able to catch yourself pretty easily since you’ll only have one foot strapped in.” Skating was simple, though she had a hard time controlling her board. Gliding, though proved to be tricky and just a little bit scary. She managed to do it though and only fell once.

“You’re doing great! Now you’re ready to start learning how to actually go down the hill. Strap your other foot in and I’ll show you what you’re going to do.” 

Once she was strapped in, he sat down next to her and showed her how to get up. “You have to push yourself up a bit and then stand up as quick as you can. Then, we’ll have you go down the hill on the heelside of your board.” He demonstrated as he explained. “The more you put your weight on your heels, the slower you’ll go. If you are on your heels enough, you’ll be stopped completely. To go down the hill, you’ll shift just a little bit of weight to your toes. This is a really easy way to control your speed.”

This was when things really got difficult again. She would try to get up and would almost make it before falling hard back onto her butt. Blue was very encouraging and understanding, unlike Wayne.

“Try one more time, and then if you don’t manage it I’ll help you up.”

She tries and falls. Smiling, he steps up towards her and reaches for her hands. She gladly takes them as he wedges his foot under her board. She pulls on him as he pulls her up and very suddenly their faces are about an inch from each other and oh wow. His eyes are even more beautiful from this close. They almost look like they’re glowing. 

Just as quickly as they found themselves an inch apart, however, Blue takes a step back and smiles, still holding her hands. “There you go, Miss Ritchi. Make sure you’re putting your weight on your heels. Good.”

She looked down at her feet in concentration then smiled back up at him and found that he was looking right into her eyes.

He blinked away sheepishly. “Now, try shifting just a little bit of your weight forwards for a second before leaning back on your heels.”

She did what he said and found to her delight that it was pretty easy to slip down the slope a little before quickly regaining control and stopping.

“Great job, Miss Ritchi! Now I’m going to let go of your hands. You’ll want to hold them out to your sides to help you keep balance. Then, try going a little farther this time.”

Roxanne tentatively let go of his hands and repeated the exercise, with Blue going backwards down the hill. This time, though, when she stopped, she promptly fell back down. She groaned.

Blue hopped back up the hill to her. “Do you think you can get up this time?”

“I want to try at least.” After a few tries with the same struggles as before, Blue came over and helped her up again. Damn. Maybe she’d just never learn how to get up on her own if it meant she got to be so close to her instructor.

He had her practice going down on her heelside some more. After falling again and again and not being able to get up on her own, Blue suggested that he show her another way to get up that might be easier for her. “The only issue is that you’ll be facing up the slope, so you’d be going down backward. I know that can be unsettling for a lot of beginners, but it’s the next step anyway.”

He showed her how to flip her board over so she was kneeling on the snow instead of sitting down. From that position, it was much easier to push herself up. Blue was right that it was easier, but he was also right that it was _terrifying_ that she couldn’t see where she’d be going.

Kneeling back down, she asked, “Can’t I turn around and just go down on my heelside for now still?”

He thought for a second. “Well, turning usually wouldn’t be something I’d teach you quite yet, but I could probably help you turn around.”

To do so, he grabbed her hands again (were those butterflies in her stomach?), but this time with just one of his. “Would it be okay if I put my hand on your waist to help you?”

She nodded, and he did. She was happy that she’d found a new excuse for him to stand close to her.

“All right, you’re going to shift some weight onto your front foot, and that’s going to start your turn. To finish, you’re going to shift your weight back to your heels and balance out.”

She followed his instructions as he continued to hold onto her. It was like a dance move as he turned around with her. 

She laughed, “that was actually a lot of fun!”

He grinned back at her. “I’m glad you are enjoying yourself, Miss Ritchi.”

They did it a couple more times as she fell and got back up and practiced going down the slope on her heelside. He encouraged her to also practice going down on her toeside, but understood how nervous it made her. “It’s an important skill, and you don’t seem like the kind of woman to be scared away from doing something. You’ll get it soon enough.”

Between smiles and turns and standing close to each other, Roxanne quickly realized that her instructor was one of the better parts of this new experience. Far too soon, he apologized saying, “You’ve made a lot of progress today Miss Ritchi, but unfortunately I have another lesson scheduled now. So I’m going to have to leave you.”

Roxanne was disappointed, but after all, she had only paid for 2 hours. So instead of sulking, she smiled at him and thanked him. “I had a lot of fun! Thanks for teaching me!”

He chuckled, “There’s still a lot to learn if you ever come back. Goodbye, Miss Ritchi.”

She watched him go for a bit before turning back to her board. She practiced on her own for a little bit. Since she could only get up on her own from her knees, she focused on trying to turn and going down on her toeside. She managed to turn around only once, but after that, she was able to make it a decent way down the hill before falling again. At that point, she just decided to take her rental back to the rental shop and wait there for Wayne.

When he found her there, he looked disappointed. “Did you give up?”

“No! Actually I had a lot of fun! I want to set up another lesson for Saturday. Are you okay with that?”

“Yeah! I was thinking about coming back anyways. I almost landed a 360 today, and I’m pretty sure I can get it next time.”

She hurried into the office and scheduled another longer lesson for Saturday, making sure she’d be taught by Blue again.

* * *

For the rest of the week, she could hardly focus on her school work. She just couldn’t wait to get back on her snowboard. 

Her excitement definitely had nothing to do with her instructor’s gentleness and patience and _those eyes,_ or the way he called her “Miss Ritchi” in the most genuinely respectful and encouraging way. Certainly, she wasn’t looking forward to him holding her hands as she struggled to stay up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the first time I'm really truly attempting a multi-chapter fic so I have no idea what kind of an update schedule I'm looking at.
> 
> Comments are great motivators.
> 
> Feel free to say hi on tumblr. My username there is the same as here.
> 
> Also if you want to see Megamind's suit, I drew it and posted it here: https://whovianhalfblood.tumblr.com/post/644131554033025024/whovianhalfblood-sigh-this-is-what-happens


	2. Intruder

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Roxanne keeps coming back for more lessons.

Saturday morning came, and Blue was surprised to see that he had half his day scheduled with Miss Roxanne Ritchi. It was rare people came back for a second lesson, and he’d never had anybody sign up for a second lesson with him specifically. Something had seemed different with her, though, he thought. It wasn’t something he’d ever felt before, and he really wasn’t sure what to make of it. 

He was glad that she was coming back. He’d had a lot of fun during her first lesson, and was looking forward to having more fun today.

When the time for her lesson came, he left the office building and went to find her by the “private lessons” sign. She was already waiting there with all her gear, and when she saw him, she flashed a huge grin at him.

“Miss Ritchi, we meet again!” he tried not to feel like he was about to melt at her smile. “Are you ready for the cha-llahnge of your second lesson?”

“Absolutely,” Miss Ritchi enthused. 

“Okay, I want to have you go down the bunny hill one more time, focusing on going on your toe edge. After that, I want to take you on the chair lift.”

Throughout the lesson, every time Blue took Miss Ritchi’s hands to help her up, or put a hand on her waist to help her shift her weight properly, he would feel a little thrill, and it was addicting. He found himself making more excuses to touch her than he normally would with a student.  _ What was going on with him? _

Their second time on the chairlift, Miss Ritchi seemed comfortable enough for conversation. “So, Miss Ritchi, how did you decide to start snowboarding?”

Her cheeks seemed to flush at the question, but he knew it was probably just the cold. “Well first of all, you really can just call me Roxanne.”

“Roxanne,” he repeated. He liked the way her name felt in his mouth.

“Well, basically, I was getting bored with other things I had to do. So my friend and I decided to start trying new things.”

“So why snowboarding?”

“My friend’s been snowboarding for a while, and he suggested it as something we could do.”

_ He _ . Why did that word sting him so much? Seriously, something must be wrong with him. He’d have to have Minion help him make sure nothing was seriously wrong with him. 

“What are some other things you’ve tried?

“Oh, not a lot. We went bowling one time. That was kind of fun. Another time, we went to a music store to try some different instruments. He really enjoyed that, but I thought it was kind of boring. Snowboarding has definitely been my favorite. It’s also the only one I’ve gone back to. What about you? How did you get into snowboarding?”

Blue really wasn’t sure how to answer that. It was tied too closely to the fact that he was alien, and he really didn’t like talking about that. Especially not with somebody who had miraculously not drawn any attention to that fact so far. So he decided to tell a half-truth.

“My, err... My ... uncle. He skis, and he tried to teach me when I was little. Snowboarding looked cooler, so I begged, and he fihn-ay-ly let me try.” He shrugged, hoping that was enough for her. Thankfully, they were close to the end of the lift, and she turned her focus to not falling when she got off.

During the rest of the lesson, she kept asking him questions. This left him entirely taken-aback. He wasn’t used to being asked about himself. Minion would ask about his day sometimes, but that wasn’t quite the same. It was nice, though, to be treated like he was interesting, and not just because he was different.

He learned that she was studying to become an investigative journalist. Well, that explained the questions, then.

She lived in Metro City, but only for school. That explained why she didn’t recognize him from his two disastrous attempts at supervillainy so far. Not that it mattered if she knew about his failures.

* * *

It was between her third and fourth lessons that Blue came to the annoying realization that he couldn’t stop thinking about Roxanne. The way she asked questions about  _ him _ like... like he was a  _ person _ . He could picture the way her bright blue eyes sparkled up at him when she managed to do something new for the first time, and the wide grin that accompanied them. She acted like she really trusted him, too.

During her fifth lesson, he took her on a slightly more advanced run. She seemed to enjoy the steeper parts, and he loved watching her discover just how exciting snowboarding could be. 

About halfway down the run, she steered too far in one direction and landed herself in a deep snowbank on the side. 

He unstrapped himself from his board and climbed back up to help her back up. It could be hard getting out of those snowbanks. Since none of the snow was packed, you usually fell a couple of feet into the fresh powder. When he got over to her, he discovered that she was  _ laughing _ with glee.

Looking down at her, buried in the snow, laughing the most beautiful laugh with the most beautiful eyes and rosy cheeks, well. That was the moment he realized he was in love with her. Shit. New level of masochism: unlocked. He knew that not in a million years could she ever feel the same about him.

Setting aside this realization to process  _ later _ , he laughed with her. “Are you oh-kee-ay, Roxanne?”

She tried to push herself up, but only succeeded in sinking her arms into the snow behind her torso, making her laugh even harder. “Yeah,” she breathed. “A little stuck, though.”

Blue stepped forward and kneeled down. “Well, since you’ve managed to get your arms stuck, is it okay if I take your board off for you?”

He could feel her staring at him as he undid the bindings on her board. Then he stood up, setting her board to the side. “If you roll to your side you should be able to at least get one hand free and I can pull you up. 

Roxanne followed his directions and reached her now-free arm towards him. He started to pull her up when suddenly, she yanked down on his arm and he toppled down right on top of her.

She giggled, “Got you!”

Blue knew he was blushing, hard. He was laying right on top of the woman he had just realized he was madly in love with and this was just proof that the world was out to hurt him. Fortunately, most of it would be covered by his helmet or could be explained away by the cold.

After a brief moment of panic, he rolled off of her and groaned. “How wonderfully ee-vil of you, Roxanne. But now how are you going to get up?”

After a few minutes of digging, they were able to get themselves free, and continued with the lesson. Mostly, he was just giving her guidance as to where she should slow down or gain some speed. 

When they got to the bottom of the run, Roxanne exclaimed, “That was so much more fun than the other one! A little scarier, but what a blast!”

If she enjoyed it that much, they could definitely go again. If she could never love him back, he could at least find some comfort in helping her find the joy of snowboarding.

* * *

The next day was Blue’s day off from teaching. He was tinkering with his brain bot design when Minion came running into the room, closed the door, and pressed himself against it. “Sir, someone’s found the lair!  _ Somebody’s here!!!” _ he whispered, panicking.

“What!? How’d they find the lair? It’s not that oversized oaf of a hee-ro, is it? Damn, I didn’t think he was that nosey.” Blue was frantically coming up with a defense plan.

“No, sir. They’re too short to be Metro Man.”

Then who could it be? Who else would have the motivation to find his lair? He grabbed his de-gun from the table. “Stay here, Minion. I’ll find out what’s going on.”

Minion took a step away from the door, allowing Blue to slip through it and towards the entrance to the layer.

He slipped through the hallways, checking around every corner cautiously. When he felt certain that whoever the intruder was hadn’t infiltrated past the heavy bunker doors, he climbed up to the rafters that were above the large garage-like space that led up to the doors. That’s when he saw the intruder. They were carrying a snowboard under their arm and a helmet in their hand.  _ So that’s how they got here _ , he thought. They were facing away from him. Good.

He dropped down behind them.

They whisked around to face him.

Wait.....

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


“Roxanne??”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This isn’t the lair we see in the movie. Megamind has currently set up shop in an old abandoned bunker he found in the mountainside. Is it easy to get materials to his lair? No. But is it just the right place to keep any accidental explosions from being noticed? Absolutely.
> 
> I am posting this at 2am so if there are any grievous errors, please be forgiving.


End file.
